That depends upon the demons that you're stuck with

What a fucked up few days.

Yesterday Thursday. I rang Dad I was in a pretty chip mood. I was telling dad how I was going to go talk to one of my boss' about comming on full time. Dedicate myself to one job. Relax on a few days off. Kick it a bit. Then he drops the bomb of "We are going to take Humphery to get put down now.. You weren't meant to know until you got home.. I'm sorry" Now, I have had Humphery since I was born. This cat was 19 years old in human years. So he was way past his expiery date. But it hit me hard. I really don't know how I am meant to feel or act upon this. I have just been in limbo with my thoughts, really all over the place. I havn't really spoken to anyone about anything. I don't really want to.

So, I wake up this morning. To an email ( In the beginning of 2009 I was in a four car pile up crash now because I am the last in the car in the crash they are all claiming against me)(For the past year I have been fighting this because it was not my fault)( Anyhow I while ago I just thought fuck it it's NRMA they wont budge no matter what I will have to pay for this shit so I said I can't afford to pay for it even if I wanted to. Which is true I work three part time jobs seven days a week and this pays for everything I need to pay for with barely anything left over. So they put in a financial difficult thing) An email which said I get declined for the financial difficulty in paying. So they think I can afford to pay YAY. So Fucked. In total they expect me to pay 14k. Cool bananas I wonder what payment plan will be organised.

I need to quit my three jobs. Forget about my hairdressing apprenticeship and find a full time job. Something reliable just until I am on top of these fucking payments. No Matter how long it takes I will get ahead.

This is the shit I have to think about everyday.